4th of July means a lot of things to different people, but we all have one thing in common: it’s ‘MURICA and we’re darn well going to dress like we mean it! From the bold and mostly silly to the serious and never-leaving-the-grill, these Amazon finds (for men AND women) will make you the talk of the town in 1 to 2 delivery days (assuming you have a Prime membership).
The pretty normal stuff is up top, but the downright hilarious and cannot miss items are about halfway down.
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“Mostly tame, but dang straight I’m celebrating today!”
Sleeveless Patriotic Mini Dress with Pockets
This lightweight flag design dress is great for a hot day out at the BBQ or if you’re meeting with friends to go bar hopping. It’s got a drawstring waist, strappy sleeves and screams MURICA all over. Be warned, this one’s a little short (but nothing says freedom like my butt cheeks coming out to say hello).
Coming in red, white, blue and every shade you can think of, this classic tank dress is a must have for every closet. The double layered, ruched body is great at hiding imperfections, which some of us might need after 5 drumsticks, a gallon of mashed potatoes and a hearty helping of gram’s patriotic cheesecake…
I found it to be a little on the larger side, so I sized down, but it’s all going to come down to how tight or loose you want it. This is a 10/10 in my books, I ‘swears it!
American Flag Kimono / Cover Up
Whether you choose to don a bathing suit or tank and shorts combo, this lightweight American flag cover up / kimono is the perfect catch all garb. It’s slightly see through, which means it’s mostly breathable, and a cheap way to add a little red, white and blue into your day.
Tipsy Elves Patriotic Men’s Button Up Shirt
Tipsy Elves is pretty much the go-to for me any time I want to theme out an outfit, so it’s no shock that I’d find a toned down patriotic men’s shirt. It’s giving that “I love freedom” vibe while hiding your intentions of going on a bender later that night.
Hey Dude Men’s Wally Patriotic Loafers
If you want to be all business up top but AMERICA on the bottom, may I suggest these very light weight, easy to slip on and off loafers by Hey Dude? It’ll seriously feel like you’re walking on clouds while you’re serving your country (by way of steak).
Blowfish Women’s Patriotic Slip On Sneakers
Blowfish is known for their very affordable, pretty good quality slip ons, which makes me feel very comfortable recommending purchasing these bad boys. I’ve got a few pairs that have lasted years, held up in washes and have yet to let me down. And if the star spangled banner isn’t your thing, they’ve got red, white and blue solids as well.
American Flag Classic Cowboy Hat
Having multi-purpose suitability, this cowboy hat is a cheeky way to block the sun. It’s made of durable straw and has pretty impressive ratings. Speaking of ratings, there’s a few funny gems in there, so I do suggest checking it out – even if only for the funny moments.
Patriotic Print Tankini Swimsuit
Ever have the confidence of a 16 year old but the love of tacos of a 40 year old? If so, may I suggest this amazing patriotic tankini? It’s a great option for those of us who can’t be bothered with peeling off an entire swimsuit to go pee. But also, if you’re a very confident 20-something with a fast metabolism – here’s a better choice for you.
Side note – I have a few of these and they are VERY comfortable. If you get multiple sets, it’s easy to mix and match, giving you more suits later down the line.
Men’s Hybrid Boardshort / Swim short Combo
I can’t forget about the fellas, I suppose you need to don your best water garb as well.
These stars and stripe board shorts double as both walking shorts and swim trunks – a great find that’ll be comfortable and functional all day long.
Women’s Quick Dry Hybrid Swim and Walking Shorts
Similar to the men’s shorts above, these hybrid swim and walking shorts are a comfortable find for a casual day by the pool, at the beach or hanging out your backyard havin’ a good ol’ time.
“I’ve got a sense of humor and DANGIT’ I’mma PARTY!”
Tipsy Elves American Flag Fanny Pack with Drink Holder
If you’ve got the confidence to rock a fanny pack and want to make your nation proud, you have to do it while you’ve got your best beverage by your side. MURICA!
Red White and Blue Hairy Headband
Fitting for both men and women, this noggin’ topper is a great way to a) add illusional height, b) celebrate Trolls, America style and c) tell that handsome young fella/lady across the room you’ve got a funny bone and not afraid to use it.
I don’t think I need to go into too much detail on why I am recommending these stars and stripes CROCS THAT WILL ROCK YOUR WORLD.
Patriotic Trump Bae Freedom Shirt
It’s like Salt Bae, Maverick and Online Trolls came together in perfect harmony to create the patriotic shirt of my dreams.
4th of July Bald Eagle FREEDOM SHIRT!
Nothing says I’ve got 20 guns, 10 steaks and whole lotta pride for my country like a bald eagle sporting the good ol’ red white and blue. And if polos are more your style, may I suggest this piece of fine art?
Tipsy Elves Bald Eagle FREEDOM Tank Top
I think I set an Amazon record for fastest tank top ever purchased when I saw this – it’s hard to say not to a bald eagle punnily pushing our freedom in others’ faces.
Ramen Cats Anime Freedom Shirt
Cats, shades, flags and a bowl of good soup – what can go wrong!
4th of July themed Tutu Tulle Skirt
Tutus aren’t just for your niece’s dance recital – they’re also for people who need a lot of attention on 4th of July. And this is a maaaaaarvelous way to do so – throw it on over leggings, pair it with your bathing suit or just plain ol wear it on your own.
10 Piece Party Headband Accessories
If you’ve got a crowd coming over and want to have a little fun, these silly headbands are a great way to add a little bit of silliness to your day. Plus if somebody looses one, which they inevitably will, it’ll hurt a little less knowing these were a pretty cheap purchase.
27 Piece Props and Party Booth Accessories Kit
If headbands aren’t enough to give your party the boost it needs, these props are a thematic way to add more zing to your pics, whether it’s via photobooth or a la 5 beers in from Aunt Patricia.
27 Piece Props and Party Booth Accessories Kit
The best way to say let freedom ring is by having your bottom proudly on display – which is why I promptly added this to my collection. They’re soooooooo soft and super cute – worth the few bucks, I say.
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